Wow.. After a long break

Wow.. i had a real long break since i last blog..

After my precious doggy passed away, i have not blog anymore.. tat was like 3yrs back.. and i did not feel like i wanted to share stuff and few things happen which make mi feel even more on my own..

I kept to myself away from my friends, kept feelings to myself, needed lots of space and think wat i wan from my friends.. so i went out wif my other friends, hang out wif new ppl, or stay home n spend time wif family.. hehe..

And a mircule happen, dunno when cupid stikes and i found myself a boyfriend.. haha.. wow.. thru the most dangerous method.. hehe..

I dunno wat kind of a relationship we have.. sometimes we are total strangers yet we can be the best lovers at times.. hmmm.. complicated rite.. i am still trying to figure out wat kind of love we have.. Issit love n hate, Strangers n lovers, or wat...

Sometimes when it gets too tired to hold on, i feels like giving up totally.. like juz 1 step n kaboom.. its all over.. but always juz before i take tat final step.. he is there to pull mi back.. bringing me back to his arms..

i dun ask him for promises cos i noe they will never come true, i dun wan to be to independent on him cos i noe he will not be the first one there when i need him due to work.. i am juz a veri easily contented woman tat wans him to love mi, care abt mi and sometimes have mie on his mind.. tats all.. but maybe the easiest things are always the hardest to do.. he can forget abt mi the moment he works.. dun even rem i am his gf.. n tat hurts..

gals always hope tat their bf will wan to spend all of their time wif her.. even for a quickie.. at least she is on his mind.. but for him, unless i make lots of noise otherwise he will go home m replenish his sleep.. haiz.. it always hurts mi when he does tat.. n he doesnt even humour mi at all.. not even sweettoke.. haiz.. he is so straight tat he doesnt even bother lying to u.. it is good in some ways, but bad in others..

i can understand all his actions when i am feel sane.. but when my emotions juz burst out.. all the reasons disappear and the onli reason left is he dun love mi anymore, doesnt wan mi anymore.. and tat is when i total collasped.. cant hold on anymore.. haiz..

guys a such trouble makers but they are oso indispenable.. haiz.. ironic rite.. haha..

Tats so much for today..